Monday, May 25, 2020


Damn.  I fell last night going from desk chair to bed, that is three steps.  I got 2 done when my knee buckled;  as I felt me going I quickly back stepped (because I always fall backward)  and ended in the chair again, none the worse for wear. However I still had to get to bed.  I took tiny baby steps, slowly, and made it to bed at last.   How long is this going to go on?  I can't just mince along as I walk for an indefinite time.

I am watching The Dead Zone.  It only loosely follows the Stephen King book, but given that the story line covers  7 seasons of hourly programs, the writers had to flesh it out with some liberties in plot.  Especially since in the book, the main character gets killed as he assasinates the Armageddon source (maybe).  Otherwise it is OK, but each episode has Johnny discovering a catastrophe, warning the key character, who never believes him, and so he must act on his own.  If it were me, I would sense the trouble, tell them to be careful (etc.) and then so long, duty done.  No one ever believes the first time, and what makes him the hero over and over is all pretty much the same, episode to episode.  And yes, he sounds and looks like a jerk too, with all that wild gazing going on.  And the scenes with his son are creepy.  And why is it that as he is exploring the haunted-style room, etc., he never turns the light on?  Don't you think he should be falling over the furniture and making a racket?

 Anyway it passes the time.

Take-out from Outback tonight, yum.  I would have gotten a blooming onion, but they don't travel well.  Ribeye steak for me.  With all the lock-downs, they should have their act together for take out by now.  When N was alive we went out to dinner every Friday, but now it becomes a major production to get me in and out of the car, into the restaurant and stow my walker nearby.  Guess I am saving money, anyway.

I got my "economic impact" check, although I am aware that it is only a fraction of the amount I paid in income taxes back in April.  Guess I will use it to get ahead in payments.  I can just visualize trump and some of his cronies sitting around in the oval office and trying ideas for how to get more votes.  They say, just give them around a thousand dollars, they will think they have won the lottery, thanks to the GOP.  Should have a real surge in votes, come November.  And they are probably right, too.  Damn.

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

posting blues


It has been too long since the last post on the first of May, you would think by now I would have scads of things to relate, but you would be wrong.  Nothing much has been different since the first, so you will have to overlook the gap, and just read this post.

I went to see the orthopedic surgeon last week.  Discouraging that he sees the break on the tibia clearly, but some new bone along the side of the bone.  He said I could retire the boot, but not do any therapy ( as I did before the fall) until he sees me in one month.  I worry that this will be like the ankle fracture on the other side from years ago, that never healed without surgery to place screws to hold the two pieces together.  I try not to worry this time.

The bank finally came through with a line of credit so that I can proceed with the renovation of the bathrooms.  Unfortunately this means that I will have to move upstairs while they work, for around 2 weeks.  Getting there is the scary part, and even descending the stairs when I can go back to my big bathroom is daunting.  I try not to dwell on the whole process.

I finished watching Downton Abbey, it seems to have a death in each episode, it is a wonder that they didn't run out of characters to complete the story.  I have been watching a few pages of other videos to try and find another series to watch.  So far no luck.  I want to begin with S1 ( the first season) so all the listings without the first season I skip.  Mostly I try to find what is reasonable (no foreign language, no black and white (like Dark Shadows), no irritating characters, not too much gore).  There are selections that I saw when they were on TV (like Eureka), so I skip those; I don't want silliness.  and I don't enjoy movies, there is no place to break off and resume later.  I do use closed captioning for UK and Oz films so I don't have to puzzle out what did he say? and miss the next three pages.  I am watching A Difficult Woman but so far it hasn't really struck me as a series (of 2 episodes!) that I will enjoy.  At least they are free with my Prime membership in Amazon.   I mostly depend on reviews and the synopsis to cut down watching stuff I know I won't enjoy.

What a trivial thing to fool around, with all the deaths (80,000 and up in the US) from the coronavirus infections.  Other than stay home, C goes to the grocery store, I haven't felt the pressure to deal with the chance of infections.  I did wish we could have had a steak dinner on Mother's Day, but other than a visit to the ortho clinic  and to have my blister checked out (infected) I haven't been outside of the house.  I read Time magazine, and watch the news on my MacBook, so I am fairly up-to-date with the progress of the infection.  Personally I think "reopening" now is a very bad idea, and predict a surge of new infections.  Hope I am wrong.  I know if the trump thinks it is OK it has to be a bad idea.  Guess he and his cohorts are suffering the pinch of very little income spending, hence the $1200 checks.  Unfortunately for them, people are spending on only vital necessities, like food, rent, medicine, credit payments, and so forth.  Hard to skim off that commerce.

That's it for today, not a thrill is it?  I hope to do better next time,  Even if it is bad jokes...


Friday, May 01, 2020

May Day, 5/1/20

Well my bad luck just goes on and on.  Now in yet even more opportunity I have gained an infected sore on the side of my right foot, from what I do not have the faintest clue.  It is large and very raw looking; C and I have kept it covered lightly and irrigated but 2 days ago I didn't like the looks of it, increasingly red and weepy, so off to Med Express, who declared it infected and put me on antibiotics for 10 days.  Since I wear my "boot" to bed, the working theory is that I rubbed my boot (very rough around the perimeter of the sole) on the edge of my unprotected foot and friction did the rest.  I'm not convinced this is what happened, but it is entirely possible.  Now I sleep with a small pillow between my knees to keep my legs separate even while I am asleep.  That foot has neuropathy and it doesn't hurt at all, which is both good and bad.

I have been watching "Goliath" with Billy Bob Thornton on Amazon prime, but I have become fed up with the dialog being "fuck" in every sentence and the bloody gore (like an up-close view of amputation ) as well, and have given up on the 3rd episode.  I think just the expletive alone would have been enough to bar it from TV but apparently not.  Anyway I have started watching Downton Abbey and with closed captioning I can even understand what is being said.  Although both Goliath and Downton show an awful amount of smoking, like TV was 45 years ago when commercials for cigarettes were taken off the air as well.  At a time back then I would not have even noticed.  I feel like I need to cough for them...

I got a book "How to draw what you see" from Amazon and flipping through it, it looks like a good step-by-step on drawing.  I'm not sure the light here is enough, and neither is the size of the table for the book and the paper, as well as the model.  Have to check it out.  I also have a copy of " Drawing on the right side of the brain".  From back in a time when there wasn't time for much of anything, between work and family jobs, horses, and so on.  I made some progress using it,  I will have to look at it as well.  It is, at least, spiral bound.  I would take the paperback to Office Depot to have it done as a spiral, but there isn't enough margin to get all of a page once cut.  Even putting each page in a protector isn't feasible because it is bigger than  8 1/2"  by 11"

The black cat who lives in the garage has been missing for over two weeks, but yesterday he reappeared, hungry, wet, thin, and demanding pets after food.  It must have been unrequited love with a female in springtime.  He is called, unimagining,  Blackie.  To distinguish him from Scaredy Gray, who undoubtedly has a real home and just comes here for snacks.  He disappears as soon as one of us shows up, but is never thin or ratty looking.  I just hope there aren't any wildlife types that have been munching the cat food while Blackie was gone.  If there are, it will be Have a Heart trap time, baiting with peanut butter.  Usually possum, ugh.

Saturday, April 25, 2020


We are currently experiencing a loud thunder storm to the north of us.  Not experience like a constant rumble, but any storm there makes me want to huddle in my room (like I have a choice).  Three cats are hiding, but one (Beans) is still on a bed having a wash-up.  She figures with them gone she gets sole custody of any laps or beds within reach.  Her favorite spot is on the keyboard interfering with typing or gaming.  It does no good to put her down, she jumps right back.  Over and over.  C usually has to put her out of his room and shut the door.  Still she sits directly outside there and howls to be let back in.  Blows your concentration.

I need to figure out how to disable or change the length of time that the screen goes dark once there is nothing being added.  Got it done

I had just mailed the IRS and the state their pound of flesh ( although I had e-filed the actual returns several weeks before).  I did it just before the $1200 that taxpayers will receive, too late to get the earliest payment.  Still, it should arrive soon, based on the projected refunds.  I still have not received the census form (s) for 2020 so I must be a low-totempole-taxpayer.  I get government SSA so I will see how it goes over the next few weeks.  I am getting dozens of offers for decreasing my mortgage, and other benefits for veterans, even though we paid off the mortgage years ago.  Don't need a reverse mortgage, windows, a new roof, a new car, a remodeled bathroom, and so on, based on N's veteran status.  Back in the 60s you either went to college, got a draft deferment, or went into the military.  N went to the Air Force and ended up stationed in Berlin then Turkey.  NOT thank god to Vietnam.  His brother and father did Vietnam and both were injured; my father-in-law came home on a stretcher.  This  was after he had retired and then was called back in.  N's brother got Agent Orange exposure and was in awful health forever after.  Vietnam, what a mess that was.

The boot I am wearing for my broken ankle has had the side effect of removing fluid from my left foot,; even my right foot is down somewhat.   If only they stay down once the boot comes off.  I can't do therapy because the ramp onto the place is very steep for the first 20 feet, and worse than that, the trip down is difficult because the walker is not built to have a braking function.  No therapy for weeks now.  I will try to do mild exercise that doesn't need the left leg for the movement.  Not too many of those, I think.

Turfing out the attic has yielded some surprising items, and lots of trash.  The donate able stuff isn't too much except clothing, but some is alright.  Bowling balls, anyone?  Golf bags with new clubs?  A small North Face tent?  gas grill?  The list goes on and on...  If Goodwill won't take things, then I will  set the things out at the curb with a "help yourself" sign.  There are lots of walkers on the Lane so someone will take them.

And if you want one shirt on the bottom of the pile...

And flitting around the net, I can definitely see where age 20 to mid 30s is full of things that look awful on women of this age:  like unicorns, glitter, band shirts, tie dyed, anything you wore in high school..Hello? you aren't in high school anymore!  You have a career, a young family, not so many dress-up events, when what you need is classy.  Elegant, in fact, for your dress-up events.  Just make sure if you need to upgrade your closet, that the replacements hit all the buttons, the best color for you, lovely, well fitting, in vogue, fetching look.  Not something crammed in your closet for years.

That's all for this post, Bye!

Sunday, April 19, 2020

Limping along

Ten days since my last post.. I wonder if any readers are left...

Well, I mainly write for myself.  For instance, I look for a post that tells me how old the brown cat is. And other vital items...

I am trusting my booted foot more as time goes by, and I can walk to the bathroom in the daytime with my walker.  Not in the night, when sleepy partners up with clumsy, for that I need C for help.  I feel so guilty for waking him for this.  Still 4 weeks to go before more x-rays.  I broke my ankle on the other leg several years ago.  I assumed it was just a sprain, and I went to my family dr. to find out how to wrap it better.  They said, "Umm.." and sent me for X-rays.  I had been walking on it for  weeks by then, and the radiologist popped his head in and said it was broken.  It never did heal, and so I had to have screws and a plate by then.  They laughed in the ER comparing me to the visits for something trivial and me walking around on a broken ankle for 2 weeks.  Dumb, I know.  Just because your ankle/arm/wrist/etc. can be moved doesn't mean it is OK.

I was looking through my lipsticks yesterday and found quite a few that never were opened, as well as ones where the twisty end was frozen.  I was especially looking for Clinique Black Honey  and eventually I found it.  The color in the tube is very black, but once put on is a clear light red color.  Neat.  I made up a goody bag for the nail lady's daughter, which I have done a couple of times before this.  Nothing like a goody bag, but I get a cosmetic bag every month, along with 5 large samples, and it all adds up.  I have a ten drawer cabinet, an egg basket, and many large zip bags of make up, sorting by type, but most of it has been sampled by me, and I only give away things that are totally unused.  Back in the day e-Bay would allow partially used cosmetics but now only unused ones.  Much better.

I haven't gotten much done on my cross stitch projects.  The most recent one I have started 3 times, apparently I can't count to ten, but now I should get enough done to see a difference.  I started it on new fabric this time, the original fabric was too limp and the used holes too large.  It didn't have anything to do with watching The Mentalist, all 7 seasons.  Nothing at all.  I am on season 7, I don't know what I will watch next.  Something with a little less guns, I think.

Bye for now!

Thursday, April 09, 2020


My ankle had not shifted in the last week, and I saw the x-rays yesterday.  So 6 weeks in the boot, which can be removed to shower, and to go to bed.  Given the current state of COVID-19 locally,  I am glad to give surgery plus in-hospital recovery a mighty big hurrah! and go home.  Everyone in the ortho clinic and later at the pharmacy were wearing masks, so I ordered a three pack from Amazon (where else?) that are 3 layers and can be washed and reworn.  The 3rd one can be used as a stand-in while another mask dries.  Somewhere in the garage, over by the painting supplies, is a box of disposable masks, but unreachable for now.  The new ones are black, and stand out from the blue ones.

And speaking of the pharmacy, we got 5 of six scripts filled, but have to return for number 6 once they get resupplied, today probably.  They have a 20 people limit inside the store, so C had to wait outside (in the car) while they prepared them.  How long does this go on?  I mean a real estimate, not what is being Trumped.  Too bad hot air doesn't work on a virus.

I have been cleared to return to therapy, for the right knee, and light work on the left knee, I will call today to schedule.  I hate to lose all the progress I have made, and I look forward to seeing someone other than us.  I think I have already begun stiffening.  Also I have been bored out of my mind...

I sent a Thank You note to my retiring psych doctor yesterday, and a note about my Dr. M appointment so they get an alert when called for records.  Too bad there are so many doctors here, but only a handful of independent psych doctors.  I certainly hope this works out.  I had my retiring dr. for 20+ years.  I had a therapist about 20 years ago who terminated our sessions even though I asked him to continue.  My replacement therapist was gold, and I didn't miss him after a week or 2.  Now she has moved away, and I am only needing psych meds from the new Dr., and no actual counseling, I think.

Friday, April 03, 2020

Ring ring...

Well, it turns out that our landline phone is not working.  We cannot call out, and there is no ring tone for calling in.  That is the reason we have had no spam calls.  It has been like this since Sunday, or earlier, and the phone company is sending a lineman to check things out on the pole, etc.  I am expecting a call from the Nephrology clinic before Friday, so I hope we don't trundle along to an appointment that has been canceled.  I can call them on my cell line, I hope, when Thursday arrives.

I was drifting around on eBay and I found a whole lot of macrame for sale.  I made an offer for a wall hanging of a tree of life ($50) and when I tried to pay for it, the message generated was "this item cannot be shipped to WV"  Say what?  Then I got a message from the seller that the shipping would be $250, did I still want it?  To which I replied, NO.  So the order was canceled whew!  This is a first for me, and I have been dealing on eBay since 1997.  I know shipping for UPS and USPS has increased in the last month, but really...

I was ill on Sunday and canceled my nail appointment.  She comes to the house and I know she depends on that payment in her budget.  The tattoo store where she works has been closed (at the same time as hair salons) for now, and if she doesn't work she doesn't get paid.  Last week one of the local nursing homes were tested and they found 29 positive cases of the virus.  Two have gone to the hospital and the others are sheltering in a closed wing of home, no visitors.  Before my parents passed away I spent a lot of time there, and I never saw anyone using the hand sanitizer on the wall, when they were coming in or leaving the room.  If they are not doing this now, I see a lot of law suits in the future.  The nursing home I was in used them faithfully, as well as soap and water, two years ago.

An update:
As if I didn't have enough bad luck, I now have more.  Tuesday at 3 a.m. I fell in the bathroom and broke my ankle.  We had to get the fire dept. guys to get me off the floor and back to bed.  By 10 a.m. I realized this was not a sprain, and when I called 911 I told them it wasn't an emergency but that I needed transport to the ER for my broken ankle.  It was either them, or have C wrestle me into his car, and neither of us wanted to do that.  So 10 or more Xrays later they fixed my broken ankle with a splint and said to call my ortho doctor for a cast.  So here I sit with a boot on, and an appointment for next week.  If the boot holds things together, great; and if it shifts I get a new surgery on my ankle.  As much as I love surgery (NOT).

Back to bed.


Sunday, March 29, 2020

Wasting away

I am going stir crazy.  It is bad enough being confined to this bedroom, but now there is no hope of being able to go somewhere - anywhere - for a change of scenery.  C went to Walmart for groceries and there were 10 or more people working feverishly to restock the shelves and cold cases.  There was a little meat, no frozen veggies, and so on for perishables that would need to come a fair distance.  He did get pizza for dinner, so all is not lost, if pizzas are available.  Still no t paper.  What, pray tell, you would need t paper for a respiratory illness?

I finished the Lost Room (a made for TV mini series) , and I am now watching The Mentalist.  It has 7 seasons so I should be good for quite a while.  I always wanted to watch this when it was on TV, but if you miss the early season, it can be hard to catch up.  Besides, this way there are no commercials.  But I can figure out where they were from the fade-to-black points.

I am getting some done on my cross stitch projects; actually I started a small project so I will feel like I am making real progress.  The one I picked is for a round piece that will make the cover of a cookie tin, and included the tin, lace, floss, fabric, needle, the works.  I am stitching it "in hand", that is, without a hoop.  As long as I can wash it when done, the hand oil will come clean, and then I will iron it gently on the back side.  That is the way I did it in the (ancient) past, and it feels right to have it easy to make the back look neat without having to continuously turn the fabric over.  The pattern says "to Cheer You" in the center, but that makes it sound like a gift for someone sick or sad.  So I changed it to "I (heart) cross stitch" and that way I can use the tin to hold stitching stuff while I am working on the next pattern.

I guess the telemarking people have stayed at home as we have very very few robocalls calls.  I wish everything slacks off, at least for a while, as we are not the right age group and routinely hang up before they deliver their pitch.  The ones that use a recording, before they start you will hear a "bloop" noise as the tape begins.  Such a boring way to pester people.

It is now one am and This is so boring I am feeling sleepy at last Too late to take Anbien, I would sleep until noon tomorrow and then feel wide awake next night.  So, good night!

Thursday, March 19, 2020

Robin pestiferous

Last year there was a robin doing battle with the side mirror on the truck.  We tried to discourage it with shiny tape, pinwheels, and so on, but migration finally solved the problem of huge amounts of bird poop all over the sides of the truck.  And wouldn't you know it, but she is back this year again.  So today I ordered mirror covers and a big inflated balloon that has owl-type eyes on it. huge ones.  Once it is inflated I figure we can tether it to the windshield wiper arms.  I don't have much hope that this will help, but I think we need to try something.

The check from the saddle sale came and it was nice to see money coming in, and not just going out.  And I got the estimate for the bathroom remodeling, but the bank is closed.  All except the drive-up windows, for two weeks, the email stated.  I can't very well discuss a loan, etc., with no one at the desks.  I may try another bank where we had the original home mortgage, although it has been paid off years ago.  So far they are open for now.

Today was the first time I have been out of the house in two weeks, and went to the dentist.  Starting tomorrow they will be closed for 2 weeks, at the direction of the state dental board.  WV has one confirmed case, but has done very little testing, which will change soon.  We live in the back of beyond, and we have a reasonable amount of food and supplies on hand, so I, at least, am catching up on Amazon prime viewing.  The latest that I am watching is called the Lost Room.  I have seen this years and years ago, and just recently tried to remember the title or actors, so when the synopsis appeared I was delighted. I am not watching it all at one sitting, I want to have a chance to mull it over as it progresses.  I am seeing it on my MacBook, it is OK even if it is a very small screen.

The college students on spring break are at the ocean partying as usual, virus or no virus.  I remember a book title, "There is no fate.  There is only choice."  I certainly don't remember being so bold when I was in college, even during the Vietnam era, but times do change.

Time to wrap this up, I haven't gotten a cartoon yet, but I will add that later.  Bye!

Thursday, March 12, 2020

It is greatly appreciated

My silver show saddle sold (say that 4 times quickly!) for more than the asking price because there were two bidders that wanted it.  The check was delivered today, and I will split the money in half with C who did all the cleaning, polishing, packing and taking it to UPS (did I mention the shipping weight was 46 pounds?) for delivery to the consignment place.  It sold for almost the price that I bought it for, back in 1975.

ANNNDDD the bathroom remodeling guy called me and said he would get the estimate by Sunday evening.  I knew he would be tied up for a couple of months with other jobs, but I need the estimate so I can go to the bank and kick around a loan.

Furthermore:  The attic guys stripped the attic of everything and carried it to the garage for us to sort through.  It wan't cheap, but the three guys worked like fiends, as one carried off a load the second one would get the next armload.  There was some debris that followed the tracks as they went in and out, but that is a small price to pay for the job to be done at last.

The psych doctor I have been seeing for 20+ years is retiring in June, and so I called the clinic and got lined up with a new doctor in June.  I signed a release for my medical records; the file is 6 inches thick and that is just volume 2.  Hopefully she will only have to send a summary that hits the high points.  Meanwhile she renewed all my meds for 6 months or a year, so a new doctor isn't trying to be read in before I need a refill.

Monday, March 09, 2020


My uncle was a high school science teacher years ago, but then took over adult education for the entire state.  It meant he had to travel a lot, but it gave him an intimate knowledge of how to get wherever  in the state.  He retired quite a while ago to help take care of my aunt, but I never expected that he would be the first to die;  she died about 5 weeks later.  Did I already relate what he said to me when we were leaving from a visit?  I was always the last to go, and he would give me a big hug and whisper," I love you".  It made me cry every time; there aren't many left to say that to me now.  It makes me cry now, too.

C is currently taking a load of junk to the transfer station and the garage looks amazing, most of the debris is gone and the floor swept of leaves.  I want to hire someone to help clear the attic into the garage where we can sort it, donate or pitch.  I have the classified ad here, but man do I hate calling a complete stranger.  Last night C burned some of the brush and 8 bales of hay, still have 50 more to burn thru the spring.  It is all moldy, must have been stacked too close to the wall where frost would form and make it all nasty when it thawed.  Baled hay doesn't burn well, even cutting the baling twine and fluffing the hay so air can penetrate.  It does eventually smolder away, with repeated attempts.  There is still more cleaning up in the barn to be done.  Of course.

The Beans cat is in the hallway crying like a baby, she is carrying her "bird" toy so she sounds like it is more a wail than a meow.  Eventually she will be flipping it up in the air and it will end up behind the washer or whatever, until we retrieve it, she has us totally trained.

We call her Beans because she is full of them.  She is 16 y.o. and I dread the day she passes, it is always the most loved that goes first.

I finally found the missing camera-to-computer cable so I can get the photos onto the Photoshop app for editing.  It was, of course, right in front of me.  Sometimes I search and search for things that I am holding in my left hand.  Sigh.

Onwards and upwards...

Thursday, February 27, 2020

Where did I come from?

I am hardly keeping awake as I type this.  I wanted to come here with a funny story but frankly I have to curtail that as I struggle to string two coherent thoughts together.

At that point I crashed.  It is now Thursday and I am still zonked; back to bed again.

Actually, my families were Scotch-Irish.  I did a lot of genealogy before N died, mostly at the West Virginia Collection in the WV University library.  I would often get distracted by stories or history of days gone by, but found some relevant facts I needed along the way.  Also a lot of insight into other times.  As an example I was looking for the parents of my grandfather in Ohio and family history said his mother was Riggleman, found on his death certificate.  But looking harder, Riggleman was not her birth name; my grandfather was named for his mother's maiden name, because he was (a bastard) illegitimate  and his stepfather, after his mother  married 4 or 5 years later than his birth, was Riggleman.  When my grandmother (Nana) had my father, her husband (my grandfather) stayed only long enough to get Dad's legitimate name on the birth certificate, and then divorced.  Nana was incensed and destroyed every photo and everything carrying his name. Nana even changed Dad's first name to the first name of her father, rather than the one picked by his father.  My dad only met his father once, after WW II, and he had no interest in carrying on any contact with Dad.  Eventually Nana remarried, but that ended divorce also.  I never heard her say anything about either husband, just "Oh, that was a long time ago..."  She had a daughter by her second husband, but she died at age 5.  My dad said he didn't remember his half-sister, but he was 13 when she died so he must have just blown me off when I asked.  Anyway, that is an example of the genealogy I searched for, and not just A married B and had C with only the bare dates recorded.

I got a photo of Dad's sister and my sister was the spitting image of her as a toddler; which explains, all these years later, why Nana favored my sister and not me as well, (her only grandchildren) who looked like my mother.

Tuesday, February 11, 2020

Damned if I do...

When I worked at the Health Science Campus doing cell culture, I worked for a woman widely known as Bitch B...  Unfortunately I didn't get the memo; my previous job ended when the money ran out and I was in a swivet to get another job before the mortgage came due.  The only revelation I got was that she wanted lots of extra time and dedication.  My job was for a group of 4 researchers combining their expertise and the Bitch was the primary investigator.  That alone should have warned me off, trying to balance my time between 4 separate people/projects.  Anyway, there was another very junior researcher in Pathology who was very happy to get some technical chops to work on her project.  She needed cells that were primary cells and Dr.B generously provided a small amount of frozen cells that I had cultivated.  She and I met with B after she had gotten some very promising results and needed another bit of frozen cells to continue.  She was eager to continue ASAP and so I took one vial of frozen cells (out of a stock of 50+ vials) before our meeting and started them in culture.  After our meeting B wanted to talk to me, and I thought, "Uh oh" and she proceeded to tear me a new one.  "Those are MY cells and you are not to start them unless I say so".  I just shook my head and she said, "What does that mean???"  And I replied, I'm damned I do (put them to grow right away) and damned if I don't (hold up the other researcher  waiting for the cells to grow).  And B launched a tedious dressing down.  She even said that other people in the department complained that I was hard to get along with.  I said mildly, that if she asked "people in the department"  who was hard to get along with, it wouldn't be my name that was on their lips.  Then she continued into my time off, my attitude (?), and so on.  She was looming over me while I sat at the table, and so I stood.  I am 5-6 inches taller than B and she backed up quickly to continue her diatribe.  I just said ,"I don't need this crap..." and walked down to personnel and put in my application for another position.  Two weeks later B told me the funding for my salary was gone, and so was I.  She gave me instructions for a couple of new experiments (that would take at least a month to complete if all went well), and I delivered the flasks to the care of a graduate student and left on two weeks vacation before starting my new job in Pathology. Bitch.

Anyway, I don't know what brought all of that up, but seeing it here I felt anew the grief and hatred of those days.  I had just lost my mother to cancer and had to put my dad in a nursing home 40 miles away which I traveled every day; he was way too confused to live alone.  And so I had to juggle him, selling their house, and an auction for their belongings; plus a new job, and it nearly put me in a hospital myself.  My new boss, thank god, was a kind and thoroughly organized guy.  Timing, everything is timing.

It has been raining here for days, but even with everything soggy, I am delighted that it is way too warm for it to be snow.  If only it would snow on the grass and leave the roads bare.  I am also aware that there is still a good bit of winter left.  Sigh.

Monday, February 03, 2020

Facebook can be pretty clever

Well here it is another Monday and my therapy went pretty well.  I am getting therapy on both knees (before it was just the one with the replacement knee) because all the support for most any movement involves putting all my (considerable) weight on the "good" knee which was feeling the burden.  So now it is readily apparent how far I have to go before I can walk without a walker or cane.  But I won't give up.  I wish my mother were still here, she had knee replacement done 10 years before she passed, and I wonder now that she never got out of her wheelchair, what she thought about me having the same procedure, and at what point did she give up on therapy?  I will never know.

The temperature today was a steady 60 degrees, for the third of Feb!  Before we moved here, we were  doing a look-see for N to check out his job, and the people he would be working with, while they got a look at him.  Anyway, our first night at the Holiday Inn it snowed buckets (and we were coming from San Fran), and the rental car did not have snow tires.  He called and they sent another car (while they probably thought he was being a wuss) and when they went to the first car to drive it away, it wouldn't start.  Click.  That was it.  Anyway, everyone remarked that it was their first snow that winter.  On February 5th.  It didn't make us feel any better.  Anyway, he took the job and retired 35 years later.  And we always had snow tires.  Chains even.  And we never got stuck.  Let's hear it for Subarus.

Around here they call student tires "snow tires".  That means they still have tread.

I've given up following the election news, and I won't donate any more money either.  I just don't have that energy anymore, and I am sure, in my heart, that the miserable wretch in office will win.  My question is, after the end of his second term if he will actually leave, or will he declare some 'trumped' up emergency that he will stay to be a dictator?  And even if he does leave, will our country ever be the same?  Will the last honest person in Washington please turn out the lights when she leaves?

Who did you think I meant?  We will see.

I am too tired to go any further, so thanks for tuning in and reading this far.  Take care!

Saturday, January 25, 2020


One of the crosstitch floss tube contributors recently posted about having a near miss when she followed a truck on the interstate that was carrying loose boards.  She thought that the load was not very well tied down, and the part sticking over the tailgate slid and bumped and such every time it met a rough stretch.  Soon enough the entire load slipped  off the truck and onto the freeway where everyone ducked and swerved to get out of the path.  How hard would have been to flip a loop or two of rope around the load?  It reminded me of one time in San Francisco when I was on the freeway, 75 MPH and 4 lanes in each direction bumper to bumper, following a garbage truck.  Attached to each rear corner was a hook, and on the hook was the BIG trash cans where they would collect bags, etc., to throw in the back of the truck.  As I followed I could see the can on the left was bouncing around.  I had to stay in that lane so I could use the upcoming off ramp.  About the time it took me to write this, the left side Big can bounced off the truck and began to rolling toward me.  There was no place to go; the can rolled toward me at 60 MPH  and just before it would have smashed me and my little Miata it hit a bump in the road.  The can sailed up above me and then down behind me where it became the problem of the guy behind me.  I never saw what the consequences were for the car behind me, my exit came up (at last) and I scooted off.  That sure was the cause of a few gray hairs right there.

At dinner last night we started talking of road mishaps we've seen or heard of.  I can vouch for the one where a very large truck exited the interstate, and as the driver was making a wide curve on the exit ramp, his truck sslloowwly tipped over spilling his load of -- garbage!  What was even worse, the garbage was on its way to a land fill here in WV from  New York City.  Heads were flying over that, no one wanted to confess to being behind the deal.  Worse yet, with the truck laying on its side, they passed a cable around the trailer and attempted to pull it back upright.  Instead, the cable made a nice clean cut through the truck, spilling more garbage and now they had two loads to clear up.  The whole fiasco was easily seen from the highway, and it took days and days to get all the garbage picked up.  And all the rhetoric about WV (Wild and Wonderful) becoming a dumping ground for big city garbage, that was the last time for that arrangement.

The second spill was of a tractor trailer load of dice that scattered the payload everywhere -- they acted like ball bearings.  And the one when the load was chickens.  They weren't hurt, but they never did find them all.  The highway patrol shut down the interstate and used big sheets of plastic to try to corral the bird brains off the highway where they could be grabbed, with limited success.  And finally there was the truck pulling a stock trailer of cattle.  They hit a big bump and the connection stayed fine, but the door at the back popped open.  The driver didn't notice until he spotted cattle in his sideview mirrors, trying to chase him down.  No fools they, get back in the box...

C and I have been making progress clearing out my closet.  So far we have done all the jeans and slacks, donating about 50% of the closet.  Some with tags still on.  I dumped lots of jeans in odd colors, and anything too tired looking went also.  We were pretty tired ourselves and will have to pick another day to work on the shirts and blouses, of which there are (gulp) hundreds.  The tag thing is pretty  simple; I would buy things out of season to save money, and when the season rolled around, I will have forgotten they were there.  The floor plans of modular homes all have WICs (walk in closets) but they aren't very large, no matter how big the entire home is.  Hence the purging.

I was really really sleepy yesterday morning, literally falling asleep in my corn flakes.  I asked C if he had given me Ambien by mistake, but when he checked, it was Friday night pills I got instead of Friday morning's.  The real culprit was Xanax.  I slept another 4 hours after breakfast, but was OK by dinner time when we went to Atrias.  We had a slice of carrot cake for dessert and split it three ways, it was so huge.  And so good.

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Gym or jim?

I always felt like I should get credit for going to the gym... not exercising, only seated at the smoothie  bar.  Doesn't that count?  I was at the gym for 2 hours...

Had to cancel the therapy on Monday, there wasn't much snow fallen (especially for a Subaru), but the driveway had a layer of ice exposed when the driveway was swept.  So the problem was getting me safely in the car.  The Sube could pull into the garage, but the only door that had enough clearance to open was the driver's door - if the car was backed into the garage the passenger door would open, but I couldn't get C out to help me with my walker.  This is why I scheduled my surgery in June (of 2017), but the final surgery was in Feb.(of 2018)  The best laid plans...

I did get my nails done yesterday, my friend had her husband bring her here.  She is more skittish than me about snow.

I am still pondering the move to a mobile home next year.  I found a web page for some floor plans that included the prices.  Wow!  The floor plan I favor is listed as starting at  $140K, which isn't bad for stick-built home, but come on, mobile homes?!  And half of our furniture won't fit.  I will get a better feel for that once I get a floor plan that is drawn to 1/4" to one foot, so I can use my furniture/kitchen/master bedroom models and see what isn't going to fit.  I am already planning what I will leave behind, once the moving is done.  I don't figure I will regret selling off things via auction, I have far far too much stuff that inertia has made me procrastinate selling while there is still time.  My Mom and Dad did the same when they moved here from Ft. Lauderdale, when I sold the house here there were boxes that had never been unpacked.  All my past  moves for us were done on Uncle Sam's dime, so a reasonable cost was no concern.

If I move to town, I won't have to worry about snow, they get very little being in a valley next to the river.

I have been sketching some this last week.  The thing is, I have to see a photo or print to sketch.  At one time I could draw from life but now I can't get the image down.  And drawing with charcoal or graphite is a lot different; for one, no erasing, it just won't come up.  If I ever do something appealing I will post it here.  It will be a while.

Time to publish this and get some lunch.  Bye!

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

Kindle-ing the written word

I bought a Kindle Gen 2 ebook ($8), and then couldn't get it to ask for (my) connection.  I did the same thing years ago when I bought my uncle's Kindle, and I don't remember any problem changing the owner to myself with that Kindle.  Anyway I looked online and found someone with the same problem, and the process was very straight forward.  Even the steps looked familiar, so I tried it and it worked like a charm.  The only hiccup  was that the battery was in need of a charge, but it came with a cable and so now I have two.  It is so nice to get something to work like it should.  My son tried the laborious method, and found that the Kindle is so old they wouldn't work.  Anyway, the name it is registered with now is M***'s 6th Kindle (blush).  I inherited my husband's Kindles (2) as well as my own so I have one gen 2, a  paper white and one large screen kindle which is very nice.  They read to me, shop with me, and do several "beta" programs.  The only problem is remembering which Kindle I want my selection to be on.  Hurting for choice.  One lives in my purse, one on my bedside table, one in the living room (drat) and so forth.  It is easier when I don't have to remember where I had it last.  In theory.

My psych doctor is messing around with my meds and it is wreaking havoc on my sleep cycle; I have to sleep all the time right now.  At least I don't have to go to work anymore, yeah.  Retirement is grand, I wish I had been able to coast along all these years.

I bought a selection of drawing pencils/charcoal sticks, etc., to keep me involved for now at least.  I used to be able to draw OK from a photograph, and I tried to buy a movable articulated horse figure, as I get confused when the legs are close together, but on Amazon they are $60! and I don't know if it would even work.  The exact same thing of a human figure is $10 - $12!  Supply and demand.  When I was in junior high the art teacher browbeat me into thinking how things, like trees, really look on paper.  I learned a lot from her that year.  I am sure they don't take art classes now except for an elective, probably in high school.  There are no sketches on the bulletin boards in elementary school where we go to vote, when it would benefit drawing skills the most.  We didn't let our kids attend that school, back in the day.  One voting day, of course right near Thanksgiving Day, there was a display of paper leaves with wishes the students had made (anonymously) and they broke my heart.  Wishes like "I wish I could stay here forever"  and "I wish my dad would come back" and" I wish I lived with Mommy and Daddy again" and "I wish I could see my sister" and on and on.  My kids went to Parochial school.  I knew they would have to face many difficult times in life, but please, not as a 6 year old.

I am currently reading Beginner's Guide to the End, Practical Advice  to Living Life and Facing Death.  I haven't gotten very far yet, but it reads in a compassionate and straightforward way.
It is the Kindle I just rejuvenated,  all charged now and I downloaded this book.  It came with a nice leather case too.  And it bills to our credit card.

That is it for today, hope this hasn't been too boring.  I can only write about the past, because the current life is totally the same day by day.  Talk about boring.


Saturday, January 11, 2020

All gone (snow)

I am starting this with a merry Christmas, although Christmas (or your favorite holiday) is over for the most part.  When I was in high school back in the dark ages, the Jewish students (a high percentage of students) got the Christmas holiday in the scheduled calendar, as well as the Jewish holidays.  There were Jewish teachers too, so we secular students attended our classes with 50% missing students AND substitute teachers as well.  I never questioned the number of religious days off, but looking back, I realize why there were so many students attending holidays.  The conclusion (for me now) was that the missing students were largely living with Jewish parents located in Miami Beach, where I was in North Miami, a cultural wasteland,  with parents that never claimed a religion affiliation.  At that time, the striving in academic venues reflected parents who wanted doctors or lawyers for their male children, and female offspring were encouraged to marry one of the high achieving  male students.  They tore down that school a couple of years ago and built a new one.  In the original school,  there was a large mosaic of the mascot and school just inside the doors to the school, and someone who stepped on the mosaic amid the hordes of incoming students were (verbally) chastised by the other students.  I wonder if they saved the design for the new school.

I finally realized that my chair here at the keyboard had to be replaced, as it listed to one side and made horrible shrieks when you wiggled a little bit.  I ordered one from Paticos, but I fear they may not be an actual source of furniture.  Should have ordered from Wayfair.  But come on, a desk chair isn't actually a high price item.  I have sent them an email and a voice message but no return call to me.  Meanwhile I am using a dining room chair so my body isn't dumped to the floor with chair wheels in my face.  Update:  I got an email from Paticos that said Sorry! We are out of stock for this item, refund soon.  So I quickly went to Wayfair and ordered the same chair, only twice the price of the other one.  At least Wayfair is reliable.

Finally got my hair cut, it is really short, but better than wispy bits poking out everywhere. Tomorrow I  hope to get my hair colored.  And no, I am not an original redhead, but when I turned gray, red looked much better than blonde with my coloring, to cover the gray.  When I had chemo for a year, not only did my hair fall out, but it stayed out for months.  I got two wigs, one blonde and one red, so I could try out both looks.  Red won.

Friday, January 10, 2020

Wicked 4 letter word (snow!)

It has been weeks since I have posted on here, I apologize if you have been checking in to see if anything resembling a post has once again been written.  Life just got in the way.  I will try to be more consistent in my posts.

I  have been  able to put on a regular shoe now that the swelling has gone down.  Still I need to walk every few days to get where I don't have to watch ever step.  I have been waiting to see if the swelling has gone for (mostly) good.  I credit my Ultram for the reduction, it is the only new item in my daily pharm.  I have seen other times when the swelling has retreated only to run again in a few days.  The
Ultram is now brand name instead of generic;  the neurologist recommended  it, and said the generic was a steroid and hard on the kidneys, while the brand was neither.

I spent the 8th, yesterday, in the hospital, what fun.  I think I  would have been admitted but I refused.  I think I will not go unless there is a compelling reason to stay.  Every time I have gone in I came home with a violent respiratory infection, so that a simple stay for "observation ",when right now there is a vicious virus going around the county which I do not need.