Friday, August 30, 2013

Senior Moments

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.  Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left.  "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.  Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring.  He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120.  Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing?  I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.  Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes.  Today is Friday.  If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused.  Then he said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a State trooper.  I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.

Bumper sticker for the day:  "If at first you don't succeed then skydiving is not for you."

Thursday, August 22, 2013


I just love pens.  Fountain pens by Parker, vintage, are my favorite, but any clever or ordinary pen that writes nicely will do.  When I worked, I had this huge ceramic pot completely filled with pens.  When co-workers asked if I had, say, a red pen, I would pretend to study the big pot, and then give them whatever they needed, no return expected.

But when I got re-assigned to a lab, I only worked there long enough to give myself a nervous breakdown, and was on sick leave for 2 months.  I came back to collect my stuff for another job (which was wonderful) and found Dr. A. had taken all my retractable gel pens.  I guess he thought I had bought them somehow with his grant money, even though I had no access to his money and had bought all those pens myself (or maybe he thought finders keepers (he was from Ethiopia, maybe property is handled differently there) or maybe he thought I wouldn't be coming back)  I saw him writing with one particular pen, a Sarasa, that came multi-colored  and archival quality, so especially useful when writing up lab data.  But what was I supposed to do, snatch it out of his hand?  Anyway, I just found these same pens while ordering a new calendar, and today they came.  I am pleased all out of proportion to the value or scarcity of these pens; I feel like I won another round with Dr. A**hole.  Pardon my french.

Bumper sticker for the day:  "Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible?"

Wednesday, August 21, 2013


I'm sitting here waiting to leave for a visit with the surgeon.  Next week I see the oncologist and the following week, the dentist, and then the new therapist.  Of all of these I dread the dentist the most.  I broke a tooth on Monday and the dentist was able to patch it up, so I can get by until that date to do a crown.  I hate it, the impression gags me and laying all the way upside down makes me feel faint.  Xanax beforehand.  No pretzels beforehand!   I called the derm doctor for an appt., and the soonest she has an opening is December!  Must be a good practice.  I have known her since she was a student in the lab where I worked, or I would probably change doctors to one closer to me. I seem to be failing one system at a time...

Speaking of failing, DH pulled a tendon in his heel, and the chiro that he goes to wrapped it, for support, like the athletes' ankles are wrapped.  When DH took it off two days later, he had a mammoth blister on the top of his foot where the bandage rubbed.  Now he has no bandage and I refuse to re-wrap it until he sees the chiro on Friday.  Meanwhile he can't get a shoe on, only his slippers.

Back from the doctor, now I have to have another procedure done.  My insurance coverage is top-notch, fortunately.

My kids (now grown) went to a Catholic school for grades 1 to 6.  Today in the grocery store I saw a little girl wearing the school uniform that my daughter did, a plaid skirt in green, red and black.  It took me back; such a benefit to have a uniform, no arguments about what matches, or too tight or too short, etc.  I fully support all schools having uniforms for their students, in addition to the benefits above, there is no competition about who has nicer clothes, designer jeans, t-shirts with questionable slogans, and on and on.  Maybe in another 20 years...

Bumper sticker for the day:  "He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit."

Saturday, August 10, 2013


Here is my first patterned knitted item, a scarf about 5 feet long. I have made hats, but the only garment I made I raveled back, it had such severe goofs in it.  So here it is my best item to date.  (Using my guitar for a prop.)

Maybe (horse) is running around the barn screaming, for no apparent reason.  Guess I'll go check it out.  Back later.

OK, she has stopped with all the screaming, still can't figure out what set her off .  One of those horsey things.

I am doing another scarf, while the pattern is fresh in my mind.  Not that it is complicated, but I want this one to be error free.  If that is even possible.  I have been machine knitting off and on for years, but I am determined to learn how to do other then straight stockinette stitch..  I am pretty pleased how this is going.  I know people say, why go to so much trouble when you can buy knitted things so cheaply?  But if you want a certain color, a certain style or fit, you could look a looonngg time and never find just what you want.  Plus, it is enjoyable to knit (as long as it is going OK.) One of a kind, too.

I am sitting here dyeing (my hair) and boy does it stink.  You would think it would destroy your hair, all those chemicals, but my hair actually behaves better right after being colored.  When my hair grew back after the chemo treatment, I left it gray for several weeks, and I would flinch every time I saw myself in a mirror, the grey made me look sickly and drab.  It took many treatments before I got my chosen color back, but I am being real particular now to keep it done.  I sure would like to be a "grandma", but not look like one.  Not that it is likely I will ever have a grandchild, both D and S are adamant about that, and given the state the world is in now I guess I can see why.  Maybe if  I rented a kid for a weekend I would change my mind.  My aunt says she kinda felt like me until she had her grandnephew for a few days, when she was glad to welcome peace and quiet back.  But think of all the baby stuff I could knit!

Bumper sticker for the day:  "Never argue with an idiot.  They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience."

Wednesday, August 07, 2013

Wordless Wednesday

Bumper sticker of the day:  "Editing is a rewording activity."

Friday, August 02, 2013

Lazy Summer Days

After some really hot weather, we have a lovely day here today, 66 degrees and fluffy white clouds in a pure blue sky.  A little chilly for swimming, but probably OK this weekend.

Above is a photo I took a few days ago.  The hummers were not the least bothered by me and my camera, there was a steady stream of birds at the feeder.  I took dozens of shots, never sure if the bird was visible or not, they move so fast!  I mostly  just listened for them and got the feeder in focus, ready for a bird.  Perversely they often fed from the openings in the back of the feeder.

Do you know the old saw about shooting photos?  If you can, shoot it good.  If you can't shoot it good, shoot it big.  If you can't shoot it big, shoot it red.  I have at least two of these covered.

See my view counter over on the right side?  Today I hit 21,000 views since 2007.  I know that is not a lot, compared to many blogs, but I am happy with it.

Bumper sticker for the day:  "Cover me:  I'm changing lanes."