Anniversary

It is with mixed emotions that I have reached 46 years of marriage, with husband who passed on May 10th.  We never did much more than a restaurant dinner, and some small gift on the day.  This year will pass without that.  We did go to Myrtle Beach for our 25th, and stayed for a week at a beach condo; and we went on a three day cruise from Boston to Montreal for our 40th anniversary.  And we went to Carmel, CA for one of the early anniversaries when we lived in San Francisco.  All of them were great, sightseeing and eating way too much.  I think I will do grilled steak tomorrow; I have never fixed them, but I guess it isn't all that hard.  My son, C, made a crock pot dinner of beef stew a few days ago which was inedible.  I've eaten some poor food, like 1000 year eggs, abalone, other ethnic meals, but this stew was the awfullest of them all.  We don't know what went wrong, if it was something in the spices, or what; it smelled good while it was cooking.  Even the dogs were less than thrilled when C mixed it with their dog food.

Our neighbor just brought us homemade cinnamon rolls, yum.  And she also gave us a macaroni salad with lots of veggies in it.  She is spoiling us!

I got our photos from the funeral back from Walmart and they made me cry.  The ones of , well here you can see for yourself:

The few we took were all done before anyone arrived, so Susan (N's sister) isn't in them since she came later, straight to the venue from Kentucky.  I never asked her how she found the funeral home, I had hoped we could have some time to visit, as she was originally planning to come the day before.  Anyway, here is the box with ashes, beautiful flowers and a stained glass backdrop.  I would have loved to take one arrangement home, but these obstreperous cats would have it in shreds in a single night.  Instead the funeral people took them to the nursing home where my mom and dad both lived at the end.  

And here is a photo of our living room, a little cluttered but not too messy.  The foot in the white sock on the right edge is of N's foot, in his favorite easy chair.  I can sit in it myself now.  Alone.

Well, this has been an uplifting post (not).  Hoping all of you are doing fine and enjoying the company of your loved ones for as long as possible...

Thought for the day:  "A clean house is the sign of a misspent life."

Sweet Willie

On June 1st, about 9 pm, we heard (the mare)one of the horses making a racket, but we could not see why she was calling.  Only one horse seen, not two.  Flashlights up in the tall grass, there was my bay gelding Willie, dead.  He was in full rigor, so he had been dead for a while.  We put the mare in the barn, and tried to figure out, by flashlight, what had happened.  But even in daylight the next day it looked like he just laid down and breathed his last.  I hope he didn't suffer, but really there was no sign one way or the other.  I spent hours on the phone trying to get someone with a farm, backhoe, and flatbed truck to get him and take him to be buried.  Our property is only 1..5 acre and anyone looking our way would see (and smell??) what we were doing trying to dig a mammoth grave and move Willie to there.  Nine hundred pounds of inert horse.  And it is not like the matter can wait, with temps in the 80s.  The man we finally found (friend of a friend of a... you get it) came in about 2 hours with his son, and had him in the truck , covered and tied down in 2 hours more.  The fee was $450, which was far less than I thought it would be.

The mare is still in the barn, because she needs to get used to no Willie.  They are siblings, Willie was the older at 25.  When we let her out it will be just in the day, so we can see what she is doing, if she starts racing around and calling.

If Norm were here it would have been so much easier, he knew people he could count on finding someone for this.  I have thought about this for the last 2 years or so, and asked here and there what we should do, given our two geriatric horses, but got no solid leads.  I will keep this man in my organizer, the way my luck is going I will need it soon.


Thought for the day: " I'm not fat.  I'm just...easier to see."

In younger days

Memorial holiday

Tomorrow is Memorial Day so most of those who work will have an extra day for the weekend.  Norm was a veteran, serving 4 years in the Air Force during the Vietnam years, as a language specialist, Russian no less.  These days those who are veterans are very much in the minority; I'm not sure when or why this happened.  The military was a good choice for guys that didn't want college, or couldn't afford it, and guys who were at loose ends for what kind of a career they wanted.  Norm's reason was the last, he figured out how poor his high school training was if you wanted to be, say, an engineer and so he enlisted.

I'm trying to get back in my usual groove, but it is hard.  I can see why people often sell up and move to another home, I still am feeling like he will walk in the door at any minute.  When I surf the channels I still mentally choose what he would like, but have no intention in actually tuning in football, golf, or PBS.  I will never have to watch NCIS or NCIS-LA again, thank my lucky stars.  He was a big fan of both of those and would, at any moment, launch into a synopsis of that weeks' episode.  Better by far to watch it myself, than to having it explained.  I would ask, how many people got killed this week?  Both of those were (are) incredibly violent.  And he had the first 7 seasons on DVDs, and taped each episode on In Demand, so he could watch it again to pick out details.

The thank you notes still have to be written for those who sent a memorial gift, or flowers, or food.  I know there is no hurry, as the memorial gathering was a week ago.

big damn wasp in here, bye

Checking in

My psych doctor called me today to see how I am doing.  She got the urine drug screen results, all 100 of them, and that I will be pleased to know that the "none detected" included heroin, ecstasy , cocaine, and that the ones detected included toprol (BP control), Seroquel (antidepression),  etc, all my prescribed meds.  She was quite amused, why someone thought it was necessary to do this panel, and if I get a bill from LabCorp or the hospital to just set it aside and she will carry the battle to them.  Whoosh!

 I'm nearly done with the minutiae of Norm's affairs and I am determined not to do this myself when I pass.  It's funny, sometimes, before his death, I would think, Hmmm, I could do this different if I was alone, not seriously considering.  Do you know, I have found very few of those things.  So far I have decreed that bananas go in the fridge, the horses stay turned out even when it rains, the cats don't get fed at our dinnertime (to get them out of the kitchen), and so on.  The one large change I will make, after all the dust settles, is to trade the whale (Highlander) for a Lexus.  That is if I have enough money to handle the purchase.

It is this time of day when my feelings of loss overwhelm me, midnight, and I know nothing will work to fix it.  Grit my teeth and go on.  Every time I would walk past his easy chair, he would reach out his hand for me to hold for a few seconds.  Now I sit in that chair, and my son is the one who reaches a hand to me.  The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Peace.

"There's no time like now to postpone doing stuff"

Life

It has been 6 days since my husband Norm died, but it feels like it was yesterday.  I can see that I am going through the reactions to grief:  according to On Grief and Grieving by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.  But I seem to be stuck in the first stage, denial . "Denial is the first of the five stages of grief. It helps us to survive the loss. In this stage, the world becomes meaningless and overwhelming. Life makes no sense. We are in a state of shock and denial. We go numb. We wonder how we can go on, if we can go on, why we should go on. We try to find a way to simply get through each day. Denial and shock help us to cope and make survival possible. Denial helps us to pace our feelings of grief. There is a grace in denial. It is nature’s way of letting in only as much as we can handle."

I keep feeling that Norm will return from a business trip.  Yesterday I looked everywhere for a certain photo of him, and I stumbled upon a sketch, a baby pencil drawing of him and his sister, that I had searched for years ago.  My immediate thought was, Norm is going to be so pleased that this turned up, and then I felt the jolt as I thought, Norm won't ever return, and will never enjoy this or anything else.  In a way I wish I could be a believer in God, but that ship sailed long ago.  I must cope.  There is so much to be done, and I keep finding more tasks as I go.  I will be finding things to do for months.  For instance, the cable bill is more than $200 a month, who would have thought this?  And his Prime status for Amazon.  And the balance of the car loan.  And on and on.

I still cry when I have to inform a caller on the phone that there isn't any reason to take a message, and I am so glad the local newspaper got his obit  in on the 13th (Friday!) so some of his contacts need not call.  The actual informal gathering at the funeral home will be on the 23rd, to give his sister time to get here.  Come to think about it, his sister may want the sketch...

I don't want this to be too maudlin of a post, so I will stop here.

Accchhh  I'm losing it.



Addendum:  My hit counter has disappeared once again, and I am too sad?  Preoccupied?  Depressed?  Whatever, to hunt up the problem or get another, so I'll just tell you, it is 38,000 or there about.

May 10th, 2016

My husband N of 45 years died this morning, here at home, on his way to another radiation treatment.  Probably from a stroke.  This was a shock, but the EMS and fire guys came almost instantly, and worked on him with CPR for 20 minutes or more.  I feel totally at sea.  I am going to go to the funeral staff and pre-plan for my own end.  It is too much to do this without any guidance when death comes calling.

I love him so much.

Keeping the boat afloat

I feel overwhelmed now that N is home.  He gets out of bed, sits in his recliner in the LR, and except for potty breaks, there he stays.  Asking for water, snacks, pills, his Kindle (charge it first), and so on.  Would you believe, the very first thing he did when he got home is turn his PC on and go to the bill pay for our bank and start firing money to the outstanding bills.  I had already paid electricity bills, credit cards, water bill, all the critical ones, so there wasn't much remaining to do, no rush.  Made me feel like a 10 year old with daddy checking my homework.

 I wonder how this is all going to shake out.  I'm not in great shape myself, and C is the one who bears the brunt of the tasks that are needed.  It isn't fair to him, and I know he is approaching a melt down himself.  I will need to intervene.  N has a new gesture; if you tell him something he doesn't want to hear (like that the kitchen counter has split in a new place) he turns his attention to the TV and goes all blank in the face.  I get up and leave the LR when he watches baseball(!!) or endless repeats of NCIS episodes.  Neither which he did before the hospital stay.  Brainwashing!!

Ah well, this too will pass, and it will most probably be far too soon.  Then I will feel bad for being cranky.  N is getting daily radiation therapy (not, thank gods, on weekends) imagine how ill he will feel when the chemo starts in another week.  And it takes hours, and leaves you feeling like some squishy thing on the waterline.  As my t-shirt says, cancer sucks.

Back to bed.  Send positive energy to us, or pray for us if that is your custom.  Peace.

Quote for the day:  "Even a small star shines in the darkness."

Cancer

Yesterday N went to the radiation unit for treatment of his metastatic lesions in his occipital lobes.  While there they (the radiologists) identified two more lesions in his chest, and those are what they will treat first, starting tomorrow (actually today) and continuing for 10 days.  It is a simple procedure for N and a quick one, except he has to go to another hospital to have it done.

I don't know why I am writing this here, it doesn't help me and I know all of you don't care.  Well, most of you.

Back to bed.

Update

My husband (N) has had a stroke and is back in the hospital.  He is "very very sick" (doctor's words) and the next 48 hours are critical.  Please send positive thoughts our way, that we can get through this together.

No funny quotes, my heart is too heavy.

Well well well

N (husband) has been diagnosed "officially" with adenocarcinoma in his lung (hasn't smoked in 45 years) and metastases into his occipital lobe on either side of his spine.  He will be going  into chemo next week for one-out-of-three weeks, for series of at least 3 times.  He will also go under the gamma knife for the brain lesions as well.  None of this is fun and giggles, and there isn't anything I can do to make it better for him.   I am wrestling with my own cognition problems.  For example I wrote myself a note "Tile floors  1 cup vinegar plus 1 gal hot water, wash with soft brush."  OK so far, right?  then it goes:  "Add somewhat of dish soap than Coptich wited so into mail muscles, the more season"  Huh??  It gets worse the later the writings/typing I try to do.  So between the two of us, we will have one functioning brain, I guess.

If not for son C we would be so much worse.  He handles the feeding of the horses, the lawn work, the kitchen clean-up and laundry and so on.  It isn't any earth shattering tasks, but I couldn't manage it all on my best day.  All this in addition to driving N to all of his appointments. 

Daughter isn't doing her share, but that will change on Saturday.  I don't expect much from her after work (she gets home at 9 pm)  But she could do some smaller tasks before work and on weekends, something besides play that ridiculous on-line game.  Grocery shopping for one; kitty litter scooping for another.  We will see how it all shakes out.  I'm looking for a lot of flouncing around so we can see how she resents all this.

That's it for now.  Send me good thoughts to get me through the months ahead.

Thought for the day:  "It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker ."

You were always on my mind

Last week N (husband) had an MRI of his head and chest because he has been huffing and puffing and felt a pain in his neck. Two days ago he got the diagnosis.

He has cancer in the occipital lobe of his brain, metastatic into his neck as well.

 I don't know if N really knows what that means, but we see the oncologist later this morning (it is 3 am now) and he will be able to ask questions.  He is seeing the same oncologist that I did, and we have an idea of what the process is.  He has weakness in his hands that he cannot use the left one to grip at all, and little air for doing anything (the cancer pushes on one lung).  We each have long term care insurance, which is a comfort to me.  He has been the one to do the bills every month; I used to do it, so I guess I will learn the process again.  Our son will have to pick up the chores for the horses, and our daughter the household tasks.  I am pretty weak walking the grocery in the huge one we go to, my knees feel like they are on fire and I need to sit down RIGHT NOW.  I will figure out something I guess, someway to break the big push in the do-it-all-now to manage smaller trips.  Thank god for our son C who has been out of work since the aftermath of his shattered knee, he can do the basics at the barn and mowing, etc.  I don't care if he gets an offer for all the resumes he has sent out, I need him here.  N doesn't agree,but I am stymied for any alternative.  I wish we had two sons!

I'm going back to bed. 
Thought for the day:  "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power."

A few regrets

I was in a shop this morning and heard this song (an oldie from Frank Sinatra, "I did it my way") on the loudspeakers.  We don't do things "our way" in real life, do we?  And we end up with more than a few regrets, sad to say.  But if you lived your life with the ultimate goal of having no regrets at the end, you'd be stuck in the starting gate, so to speak.  No one has a handbook for an error-less passage through life, including those who claim the Bible is such a roadmap.

So much for philosophy.

I got up Sunday and thought how bright and sunny it looked outside, and then I lifted the window shade and THERE IT WAS!!  Snow! 4 inches on April 3rd !!  It didn't last too long, it was in the 50s the rest of the day, but it sure spoiled my morning.  It's spring, dammit.  The stink bugs got the memo, we killed 6 in the house yesterday, so at least some of them are out and about.  We have sealed every possible crack and still they find their way in.

I see my doctor tomorrow, where we can discuss my so-called positive urine test for pot.  It is impossible to prove a negative.  I can swear up and down I don't do pot, but doctor B would have to take it on faith, and he doesn't know me.  And users can be most convincing liars and pot is available everywhere, I guess.  I don't know how I would find some, but wouldn't it be nice if it were legal?  I don't have a problem now, but boy I wish I had some MJ back when I had chemotherapy.  I had drugs that vanquished the pain, but the nausea was grim, even using phenergan.  And with all of that, I still didn't lose weight.  Sigh.  Anyway, I plan on telling Dr.B that if he won't give me opioids when my test/tests are positive, then don't.  I would rather manage my knee and shoulder pain with OTC drugs than having to pee in a cup every time I see him.

AND I am so glad, once again, that I am not working, or trying for a new job, or dependent on one doctor for all my meds.  I have read some sad tales of people losing their job, home, children, everything, from a positive test.

Thought for the day:  "Why would I want to delete cookies?!"

Apologies

I have been neglecting my blog for the last month, and mainly writing email to special friends.  I find emails and blog posts are better off when not co-mingled.  So, one or the other are up-to-date, and the other is lame.  Multitasking anyone?

I went to see yet another family doctor 2 weeks ago, following the three visit doctor who moved away just as I was feeling comfortable with him.  He asked about drug testing. and I was a little taken aback,  this on the first visit, but I said "sure".  Urine specimen, on my way out, and guess what? It came back positive for THC (pot) and benzodiazapine (Xanax).  Xanax is fine, I have a script for years and years (anti anxiety and help sleeping) but the pot screen!  I haven't smoked a joint in 40 years (San Francisco days).  Back home and onto the net, and lo, it turns out naproxen (Aleve) cross reacts to the THC test.  I have a scrip for naproxen,(it is there on my drug list, twice a day each day) so I got a script for testing at the hospital (vs. doctor office dip stick) from my psyc. doctor (she says she never tests her patients, they are taking this and that and the tests are always positive) , and meanwhile I am taking no Aleve.  I feel it, tylenol just doesn't cut it for knee pain; my knees pain me awake or asleep, I even dream about knee pain.   The new regs for pain meds leave legitimate patients like me bearing the brunt of the results.  Do you know, the street price of Oxycontin is so high that people are switching to heroin because it is cheaper?  Crazy world.  It is only sparingly used for post-surgical pain, because it is "redirected" to the black market it is so pricey.  No knee surgery for me anytime soon.

I finished the income taxes for us and our two kids today , don't get me started on THAT.

This isn't very long of a post, but it is 4 am and I am back to bed. 

Motto for today "  Everything we have is taxed - even our patience."


 

Leaping lizards!

OK, I have tried to think about what to write here, and for now I am stuck (writer's block) so ah ha! I have figured out how to get my keyboard to sing, and that is to have this itty bitty post as a place holder.  Once I can come up with topics, anything, I will append it here.  I mean, how many times will I get to say "Happy New Leap Day."  I want to do something, write something, special.  Bye for now...

I went to see my new family doctor and and went over all the stuff in my file.  I am really
tired of having to dredge up the dates and who and what they were.  My memory wasn't very cooperative today and I felt like I needed remedial memory retrieve work.  But maybe getting my meds straightened out will point us in the right direction, I hope.  Meanwhile when my family asks me questions  I can say I don't remember.  Period..    Sometimes I remember the answer the next day, oh well. I resolve to beat myself up before going and writing details, and take it with me so I won't feel so scatter brained.  After all, I have 9 doctors, from B to W, And I don't see some of them more than once a year.) 

 

When making out your tax return , it's better to give than to deceive.

You would think that after 12 or 15 years of doing the income taxes I would be able to whiz right through them.  But our elected representatives in their infinite wisdom have in a major way amended the tax laws again, boo hiss.  Sigh.  Too bad bitching doesn't burn calories.

The temp hereabout has slowly crept up, but my enjoyment of it is blunted because the stinkbugs have slowly crept up too.  Horrible icky bugs, which are at least slow and they like to climb the walls which makes them easy to see.  If only they didn't fly (poorly) we could leave them to the cats, who occasionally get one on the floor what great fun.  The smell doesn't seem to faze them.

When I grew up in Miami FL I had a horror of cockroaches.  Palmetto bugs some people call them, because if you peel back a layer of a coconut palm tree you will find a nest of them, too gross to even think about.  They can grow to several inches in length, and are also half of that in width, and are flyers.  At night I could hear if there were one in the bedroom, their legs making clicker sounds, and I had to get up right then turn on the lights and search it out.  When N and I shared a bedroom at Mom's house (after our marriage, I hasten to add) I shrieked when I saw one in our suitcase.  N said (a little condescendingly, I thought) "I'll take care of it".  And when he lifted the top piece of clothing, there it was.  He let out a shriek to match mine, jumped back and dropped the clothing back into the suitcase, and said "THAT'S a roach??!!"  And I split before it could get between me and the door, and let N take care of it.  I've never seen a roach here in WV in the house, and very few outside as well.  But just because you don't see them, doesn't mean they aren't there...

This blog post is not the interesting and cheerful one I like to think I mostly make.  I read an article in BlogHer.com that lists suggested topics when the old brain stalls, and it was all either things I am not qualified to comment on (like,bragging on your beautiful granddaughter) or there are the ever-present  memes, the motivational ones that are less than "cool and empowering" and more like "condescending and trite" particularly the ones aimed at readers who are struggling with depression, etc.  So I will end this for today, wishing all of you an enjoyable day.

Bumpersticker for the day:  "Life is short.  Smile while you still have teeth."

Valentine's day

Yum!  I got three hearts filled with candy, and 3 Dozen roses (red, yellow and pink) And they are very fresh and have some fragrance. The cats have been very well behaved and leave the roses alone.  I have given up trying to get Family Tree Maker to work on the MacBook Air, I am not sure why it doesn't work; it is the way I set up FTM on the MacBook all those years ago, but not currently.  I can't run the FTM for MAC, because the version of the OS (El Capitan) is not functional, the blurbs on the box notwithstanding. And the partition for Windows seems to come and go.  Ah well, not a terrible crisis.

We got 8 inches of snow last week, I am so tired of winter.  I haven't been out of the house since my doctor's appointment last Monday.  Partly it is due to the ice on the driveway, and partly due to my nerves once we are underway.  If you try and leave space between yourself and the car ahead of you, another car will zip past us and get between in the "buffer" space.  I've got 4 wheel drive, and snow tires, so I can zoom along as if there were dry pavement, right?  Mutter mutter.

Old barn + old horse

Tonight the temp was 2 degrees, and I want to see that end too.  I love love the heated tack room in the barn, so the water is still liquid, and the hose works too.  Back when we had the old barn, we had to haul buckets of water from the bathroom.  Sometimes we had to fill each one twice, because they would drink the first bucket dry immediately.  And the stalls were open at the front, brrrr.  The new barn is pretty good looking, even from the road.

new barn

Time for bed again.
Bumper sticker:  "The last time I reached for the stars I pulled a muscle"

Winter moving into spring

Well. Old man winter has paid us another visit.  It is about 8 inches of snow as near as we can tell.  I hope this is the last of the snow, the state plows usually come through once maybe tomorrow.  I have been extra careful when I come and go in the Highlander.  Last year I fell and slid under the car which was running at the time and this winter I have practiced getting in and out.  I hate this toyota I didn't want it then and I sure do not want it now.  N asked if I liked it, there on lot.  I said "no"  and he went ahead and and bought it,  I have driven it once.  For 16 years I had my own car,  well, 3 Miatas:   a 1996, a 1999, and a 2002.  But once I retired the 2002 sat in the garage and any time I wanted to take it, the battery was dead.  Finally we sold it for a not-too-great amount, I couldn't stand to watch the guy drive away.  We still have the pickup truck, it probably gets driven about 7 times a year and it needs to be jumped every time too; why not trade it in instead of the Miata?

I've got to admit the Highlander goes better in the snow.  We can't drive a little bitty Miata,when the snow is higher than the car,  Not to mention it is rear wheel drive.

I watched the DVD for "Riddick" this afternoon which is pretty dated, but I liked it.  I couldn't get it to run on my computer (not a Blu Ray), It would play on the gigantic TV, but if a movie is gory, it is a lot easier to look away and turn the sound down when the screen is 7".  I know I am a wuss when it comes to decapitation, sharp machete and so on, but I just look away.  In the end I watched it on my little MacBook Air, now that I got a CD/DVD player for it.  One for Mac, 0 for PC.

We've been looking at the latest catalog for nursery plants.  How do they always arrive on a dreary snowy day?  So for we have narrowed a tree down to either a weeping cherry or one other whose name escapes me.  I will plant this in honor of Suzanne, who died last fall.  She always loved the blooms on everything,  When I was down in FL the last time, she showed me a night blooming cercus that only blooms at night with a fragrant bloom which dies in the morning. I miss her .

Bumper Sticker for the day:  "Honk if you love Jesus.  Text if you want to meet him."

Not very cold here

...But we got 20 inches of snow.  It is hard to know where to measure, with drifted and scoured snow, but checking here and there that is the estimate for this storm.  Luckily the follow-up rain hasn't materialized yet, making everything not completely clear into ice.

I am feeling a little cabin fever-ish right now, but I got some new yarn yesterday in the mail from Turkey, a dark heather gray color, to make a scarf along with a lacey pattern in cameo pink on the reverse side.  I finally gave up on the decorated hat, it was too complicated for me at this stage of my knitting ability.  The pink and the gray should make the pattern stand out on both sides.

The colic-y horse Willie is back on regular rations and seems all over his colic .  The farrier came yesterday and said his hooves look great, even, uncracked, and he was not even sore on the right hind leg (the horse, not the shoer) which he sometimes resists having it picked up.  Usually that is really the left hind that is sore (and has to take all the weight when the right side is picked up) but either way the bute (horse aspirin) given the day before seems to do the trick.  Both horses got wormed (ick) as they do every 8 weeks when the shoer comes, and though the winter blankets and winter coats make them look like Mongolian ponies, they are warm and, under the blankets, clean.  My very first horse, all those years and years ago, was a palomino, and I kept him clean and groomed every day.  I boarded for a while at the stables in Golden Gate Park, and when I washed his white mane, and dried it with a blow dryer,we never failed to attract a crowd.  Old times.  He was 22 when he died.  I miss Poco still.

 Thought for the day:  "Lottery:  A tax on people who are bad at math."

Poco

 

 

 

 

 

Blizzard?

Well,the forecast is for 8 to 12 inches of new snow beginning this afternoon; and every function in the area for this weekend has been canceled.  I wonder what a wedding scheduled for the weekend will do?  And I can't help remembering the time when John Rockefeller was governor here in WV and a huge snowfall was predicted.  He called for the National Guard, canceled all the state and university activities, and we got zip.  After that, snow could be 4 feet drifted and he wouldn't call anything off.  Once bitten...

DH was at the grocery store yesterday to pick up 2 items, and never thought to get milk or orange juice (a vital necessity) and thus he went out this morning.  They were restocking the milk when he got there, the crowds he dreaded were nowhere to be seen, the shelves were pretty depleted and all the snow shovels had been sold out.  I think we should buy milk every time we are in the store, we will never run out!  The other big item everyone stocks before a storm is, you guessed it, bathroom paper.  We are fortunately OK there, as it was sold out except for weird brands and single Scott rolls.

Best of all, both DD and DS have today off, as the storm should be OK to go to work, but a mess to get home.  We even got a call from the pharmacy to make sure all our (many) scripts are filled in case the roads are impassable.  Do you think they would refill my hydrocodone pills?  No, I don't think so either.

I am doing the never ending task of laundry today, hoping we don't lose the power.  I was in the shower one evening and the power went out.  It is dark in there!  And my hair was all soapy so I couldn't just step out.  I keep a flashlight nearby now, just in case history repeats itself.

My birthday is soon, I got my driver's license renewed last week, and I don't even recognize myself in the photo.  I forgot to tip my glasses up and so my eyes look like Orphan Annie from the flash making a white spot on the lenses.  My jacket hood is visible on one side, and makes me look hunchbacked.  And worst of all, my double chin shows!  Sigh...

Thought for the day:  " Who needs a spring chicken when you can have a well-seasoned bird?"

This is your brain on chocolate

 

  All the Christmas candy is GONE!  Even the fruitcake! Who could have eaten it all? (Burp).

I was sure that I had written another post in January, but it only seems to reside in my brain, and not here.  So I will get something down today before all you lovely people will be reduced to reading cereal boxes (my nearest competitor).

Last week we had a new crisis.  C went out to feed the horses and came running back to the house to tell us Willie (24 year old gelding) was colic-ing.  He was cast in his stall (laying so close to the wall that he couldn't get his legs under him to stand up).  We un-cast him ( a simple (!!) matter of flipping him upside down) but he had sweated so much his blanket literally dripped.  We stripped that off and put on a dry one, and began the tedious business of walking him round and round to keep him on his feet.  I had some injectable smooth muscle relaxing med to keep him comfortable (well...) and we dosed him with mineral oil to ease things along, so to speak, until the vet came.  The vet gave him several different meds and listened to his gut sounds until he could hear normal rumbles.  He was here around an hour, and the bill was $$$, but the alternative was a horse that rolled until his gut twisted, and that equals a dead horse.  Post treatment he has recovered well, although he is on a no-grain regimen.  Horses are really poorly engineered, one whose only defense is to run away, and to have no way to vomit or even burp, so everything has to exit at the rear of the bus.  We will never know the cause of this - did the casting come before or after the colic?  I really don't think he has ever done this before, and since he was born here I have a pretty good handle on his medical history.  We'll just have to keep an eye on him closely until springtime.  Don't you wish you had horses?

We have been having snow showers the last few days, and it is snowing now.  I have a different attitude about snow than I did when I was a teenager growing up in Miami FL.  All I wanted was to be able to play in it, and when I was in college in SC that is what we did.  Now, though, I understand what people meant when they said, you haven't driven in it.  I am a total chicken, and not having to work means we can postpone appt and non-critical trips indefinitely.  And of course there is worrying about R and C having to drive in it.  I should be glad that this little snow is the most we have had so far this winter.  All the trees and flowers are confused, and several have started to bloom (forsythia, cherry, and the hosta is starting too) so I don't know if they will bloom again in the spring, or is this it for the year?

Thought for the day:  "Oh, no!  Not ANOTHER  learning experience!"