Thursday, September 03, 2009

Pretty Lame

It took two days and five people, but we got the lumber out, all the branches gathered and chipped up, the chips spread under the shelter roof, and sufficiently healed ourselves so we can bend over again. NEVER again.

I enrolled in another online photo workshop, this one for the Nikon D40 camera, which I bought not long ago. The manual for it is almost useless, explaining what a button or dial is for (like " this button switch between AE-S and AE-F") which means WTF? It starts in October, and I will post photos from the classes here. Aren't you thrilled?

We have too many cats. Between the dogs and the cats, we are regular clients at the vets, and honor I could do without. Just keeping up with the food and litter requirements is a major task. And we don't have enough laps to go around, so the cats play musical laps. (This only makes sense if you know what musical chairs is.)

One story from childhood you might enjoy. Or not. Anyway, I went to a private school for first grade, because I was only 4 when I started. From second through to high school I was the youngest in my class, and certainly one of the most ignorant when it came to dirty jokes and such.
For example:

A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the" night. We're having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out. And I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky after that. Once she's had me, she'll want me all the time, so you'd better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves.

Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person."

He leans over to her and says, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."

I had a vague idea about "getting lucky" but what were condoms? So ignorant. Not like today when any 8 year old can tell jokes (other than knock knock jokes).

"Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white
stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't
know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did
and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other
zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are
what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black
stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."

Or maybe not. Most kids' jokes have something about poop in them.

Onwards, ever onwards. Pictures, next time, I promise.

Bumper sticker: "Boldly going nowhere."

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