Monday, April 11, 2016

You were always on my mind

Last week N (husband) had an MRI of his head and chest because he has been huffing and puffing and felt a pain in his neck. Two days ago he got the diagnosis.

He has cancer in the occipital lobe of his brain, metastatic into his neck as well.

 I don't know if N really knows what that means, but we see the oncologist later this morning (it is 3 am now) and he will be able to ask questions.  He is seeing the same oncologist that I did, and we have an idea of what the process is.  He has weakness in his hands that he cannot use the left one to grip at all, and little air for doing anything (the cancer pushes on one lung).  We each have long term care insurance, which is a comfort to me.  He has been the one to do the bills every month; I used to do it, so I guess I will learn the process again.  Our son will have to pick up the chores for the horses, and our daughter the household tasks.  I am pretty weak walking the grocery in the huge one we go to, my knees feel like they are on fire and I need to sit down RIGHT NOW.  I will figure out something I guess, someway to break the big push in the do-it-all-now to manage smaller trips.  Thank god for our son C who has been out of work since the aftermath of his shattered knee, he can do the basics at the barn and mowing, etc.  I don't care if he gets an offer for all the resumes he has sent out, I need him here.  N doesn't agree,but I am stymied for any alternative.  I wish we had two sons!

I'm going back to bed. 
Thought for the day:  "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power."



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