Tuesday, January 03, 2006

TV commercials

Just for instance...
Am I the only one who finds the Burger King commercials with the plastic headed King more than a little creepy? The white tights, and the little silk dancing shoes? Or the great big "King Kong" sized King peering in the window at the blonde girl, who forgets all her fear when he hands her a Whopper? If I ever saw anything like the King on the street, burger or no burger, be assured I'd run the other way...

And the commercial for the "male enhancement" supplements, I think one is called Enzyte, with the super smarmy guy with the toothy grin who is (so they suggest) the envy of all his neighbors after he jumps in the swimming pool and loses his swim trunks? Are we supposed to believe that after using Enzyte, he is now noticably super endowed, or is he just super virile? Or has a constant hard-on? Or what? Just in the interest of scientific discovery, of course...

And what do you think of the bikini clad lovelies and oiled hunky guys working out on the Bowflex, the Ab cruncher, Nautilus equipment, or whatever. Do you think they REALLY got those six pack abs in three 20 minute workouts a week? I think not. I bet they spend hours and hours in the gym, weight lifting, running, stair climbing, aerobics, and resistance training to the total exclusion of a real life. Not to mention steroids (so that now the guys at least need Enzyte too).

Do they think we really believe a green lizard is a good source of information about car insurance? Most of the tiny green lizards I see are pancaked to my driveway, and aren't saying much about anything.

And that wee tiny print at the end of all the ads, the REAL information that disclaims all the foregoing information in the commercial, why do I get the feeling they don't want or expect that it will be read, since they put it up in type smaller than the phone book, and leave it on the screen for all of 0.5 seconds? I notice that as TVs have gotten larger, that the typeface is even smaller than it was before...imagine seeing it on a 9" screen, it would look like smudged bird crap.

And I really resent the ads for anti-depressants. In the first place, I think advertising aimed at the patient enormously inflates the price of the medication for the consumer (there are only two countries in the world which allow direct-to-consumer advertising of pharmaceuticals). In the second place, the little idea that something as complicated as depression can be "fixed" with a mere pill leaves those of us struggling for years with depression with the feeling that we must be malingering if we don't become cured after popping this miracle pill. And in the third place, I resent the way they glibly hurry through the list of "side effects", many of which are fatal or life-threatening. If you've ever looked at the listing for a drug in the PDR (Physician's desk reference)then you know the known side effects go on and on, include common and uncommon effects with percentages, and include special warnings for lactating mothers, pregnant women, children, and other special groups. This is information that presumably your physician and/or pharmacist are familiar with, accounting for why they may well say "no" when the patient asks for a particular drug. And this doesn't even mention drug inter-actions and unique side effects or allergic reactions.

And don't even get me started on ads like the ones for Victoria Secrets underwear, with their impossible standard of feminine beauty--do we really need to see these so that we can feel even more inadequate in our own skins?

This is just my opinion, of course-- an Un-bowflexed, Non-luscious, dull toothed, finely wrinkled, depressed, medicated, woman who will probably need a house Scooter for mobility, a Medic Alert button around my neck, supplemental medicare insurance, and a lifetime supply of Jack Daniels before long.

4 comments :

Pat Kirby said...

The commercial for Hardee's/Carl's Jr milkshakes squicks me out. A goober-looking guy gyrate against a cow. The cow looks worried and the guy looks..."too happy."

Ick.

Vanina said...

Some of the things you said here really hit home! I've often wondered about the Burger King, "king"... he is definitely a bit freaky...

And the list of side effects for the drug commercials are mind boggling: so you are trading social anxiety for diarrhea, headaches, and failure to perform... uh..., seems like you may have depression after that.

But, then again, there are also a lot of commercials that are absolutely hilarious! Like the Capital One. Maybe we just watch too many commercials?? :)

katie said...

You are totally not alone. I think the worst Burger King commercial is the one where the king is in the guys back seat. If I turned to find that guy in my car I would have a heart attack.

Carolyn said...

You're so on the money with these Marilyn! I can't stand those ads, especially the Burger King. And like Pat, that guy with the cow DOES look too happy!